One of the hardest things to deal with can be reality hitting you smack dab in the face. Here's our reality... our sweet Harley girl has been fighting lymphoma now for about 7 months. When we got the diagnosis we were shocked, sad, mad, and so many emotions. We were also sure it was not her time to go. She was still running, playing, eating, and all the other things our Harley girl does. She doesn't look sick! Much less like she is dying...
We made the decision to start her on treatment almost immediately. We were not going to give up on her yet. No way. It's been a long 7 months of weekly doctor visits, lots of medicine, special food, watching poops (yes, you heard me), and lots of love.
Our current reality is the cancer is starting to take over. We feel we are no longer winning at keeping it at bay. Her white blood cell count has been too low to do chemo for the past few visits which has given the tumors even more time to grow. She sleeps quite a bit, walks pretty slow and her feet slip on the tile. She's peaceful and loved. She gets fresh chicken and meat any time she wants it. She gets kisses and rubs all the time. She's getting our love and we'll keep giving it to her until she tells us she's done fighting.
Our hearts are broken and we've shed many tears over these past 7 months for this dog who has blessed our lives immensely for 11 years. The fact is, I'll never be ready to say goodbye. I can't imagine working at my desk without her lying by my side, or following us into every room we go into, or thumping her water bowl when I haven't noticed it's gone dry. Lonely.
We have another visit on Monday to see if she's well enough to get chemo. I'm hoping for the best, but in my heart I feel it's not going to be what we want to hear. I don't know for certain how much longer she will be here, but I plan to make every day count.
I love you Harley girl. Always.
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